My father’s brother Adam was one of the most influential forces on me during my upbringing. A talented songwriter and multi-instrumentalist, he inspired me to pursue music from a very young age; some of my earliest memories are of sitting next to him at the piano as he played, and improvising along with his music. During my high school years, however, Adam’s demons began growing stronger and stronger and eventually overcame him, warping him beyond recognition and violently tearing him out of me and my parents’ lives.

This piece attempts to make sense of the broken, swirling shards of him left in me. It expresses my anger towards him; my deep, deep sorrow and grief for the loss of him; and the lingering, tenacious hope that he may one day triumph over his demons and our relationship may begin to be reconstructed.